“I want to write a book some day,” said almost every person ever.
Writing a book is on a lot of people’s ‘some day’ list and it has been on mine for at least a decade. I love to read and I love to write, so it always felt like I’d end up writing one of my own (some day). And yet for all the times I’ve said that I’m going to write one, I’ve dedicated little to no time to ever sitting down and bloody doing it.
Yes, folks. I’m finally writing a book. And it feels bloody great to be able to say that and know it’s the truth. For years now I’ve been talking about doing this; it’s been so long that some people who I told my plans to years back have started asking “So, have you written your book yet?” and “How far along are you with your book?” and I awkwardly um and um while I come up with some crappy excuse as to why I have yet to start typing. I even wrote about writing a book on this blog more than a year ago (and no, I didn’t do much writing then either).
The truth is, I’m not too sure why I haven’t done it yet. Maybe it’s because I’ve been scared shitless of siting down to write it only to figure out that I’m crap. Maybe it’s because I’m a bit of a perfectionist so I didn’t feel like I could start until I had the perfect idea. Maybe it’s because I’m worried about pouring months of work into it and it never selling. Loads of maybes.
What I do know is that since I officially started a few days ago, I’ve been working on it consistently and it’s so exciting to see it all start to come to life. I’m writing a memoir about love and men and relationships and all that scary stuff. I’ve always had a bit of a challenging time when it’s come to my relationship with the opposite sex, and when I first got together with Ankit I was as experienced as a teenage girl (this was my first real relationship. Yes, at the age of 29. Tragic, isn’t it?). It’s been a long and bumpy ride, and this memoir will look at my relationship with him and how I navigated it all while wrestling with my inner demons.
That’s the gist of it. I don’t want to give away too much at this point, so keep your eyes peeled for more details.
So why now? Well, I’m experiencing one of those horrible, dreaded lulls in my freelance work. No new clients are materialising and existing ones don’t have any work for me. I spent the first week of this lull feeling a bit hopeless and down about it. I don’t deal well with a lack of work; I wake up late (then get moody about the fact I’ve woken up late) and spend my day mindlessly scrolling through Facebook and thinking “woe is me.”
This time, though, I decided to put this time to good use. It was Ankit (who has been telling me to get on with my book for years) who suggested that maybe I should give up looking for new clients and just write my book. And it made sense. I have a great idea for the memoir and we’re living in Saigon, which is ridiculously cheap, so I don’t need to worry about denting my savings too much. So I started and now I cannot stop.
I’m ridiculously excited about this and look forward to sharing more with you guys as time goes on.
No more ‘some day’ for me – I’m bloody doing it!