It’s been a while. In fact, it’s been longer than a ‘while,’ so I apologise for the distinct lack of blog entries. See, a funny thing happened when I got to Dubai three weeks ago. After a good month or two of feeling all out of sorts and completely unsure of what I should be doing, I returned to the place I called home for five years and everything started to make sense again.
Before I arrived in the UAE, I wondered whether it would be strange being back knowing that I’m just a visitor this time round. But there was nothing strange about it. It felt so natural, so normal, so nice. Seeing the friends who I’m proud to regard as family made me realise more than ever that I’m blessed to have the people who I have in my life.
After a week of doing very little other than drinking and catching up with people, I then started to work on some freelance articles. The buzz of working for myself is indescribable. I have the freedom of where I work, who I work for, and what I write. Sniffing out new, interesting things to write about made me feel alive again.
The date loomed for me to leave Dubai and head for Thailand. At the last minute, my friend, whom I was meeting in Bangkok, told me she wouldn’t be able to meet me for a few more days, as she was stuck in Laos on a visa run. The thought of leaving everyone here and heading to Thailand on my own made me miserable, so I decided to stay a little longer.
I’m not sure if it’s fate or pure coincidence, but having that extra week to think made me realise that I don’t want to travel anymore. The excitement and enthusiasm I had for it before I left Dubai has dissipated. Perhaps it’s my own fault for staying at home for so long, but I’m already sick of feeling rootless, and I’ve only been gone for about three months.
I wrestled with these thoughts for days. Should I just go and hope that I start enjoying it once I’m on the road? Am I getting cold feet? Am I just a weirdo who cannot make a decision and stick to it to save her life?
I then decided to think objectively. I don’t want to travel at the moment – so am I going to force myself to waste my hard-earned cash on something I’m just not interested in doing for now? No. What do I want to do? I want to make a go of my freelance career, now that I have the money to finance my visa and to keep me going until the work rolls in. A job opportunity also came up that sounds perfect for me, so I’m currently in the process of being interviewed for that. Strangely enough, I got headhunted for it despite the fact I haven’t sent my CV to anyone in almost a year.
The bottom line is that instead of thinking tirelessly over what to do next, I’m simply doing what is making me happy. Right now, I’m so happy to be back here and that’s all that matters to me. I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who think I’m a fool – I quit my job, sold everything and left with the intention of travelling, and here I am, back in Dubai. But I don’t care. I’m doing what’s best for me.
Where does this leave my travels? Well, the truth is I will always have itchy feet and I’ll definitely want to venture off at some point. I’m now looking at doing it in a way in which I can base myself in Dubai, but go on trips that are perhaps part of my freelance work.
So, Angie is no longer on tour. Angie is back where she started when she began this journey a few months ago. But all that matters is that for now is Angie is damn happy, and that’s exactly why I quit my job all those months ago – in the pursuit of happiness.
I guess I can say it’s been a mission well accomplished.